Sunday, May 29, 2011

You Made Me Laugh, You Made Me Cry, But I Hate Saying Goodbye

Wow, what a week it has been! We just finished up the school year and I am officially done with my first as a teacher!! I cannot believe how fast time has flown by! In the past week we have had our last Honors Assembly, Baccalaureate Mass, and Graduation! And to top it all off we said goodbye to Alex yesterday and she made her way back home to continue her journey. All of this reminded me of how short this experience is and how fast it goes by. I feel like it was just yesterday we were at Orientation at Boston College talking about how we would live simply if we found treasure buried in the Pacific Ocean that we might stumble upon during a snorkeling adventure. Soon we will also have to part with our second years who have supported us and given us so many irreplacable gifts and memories in the past year. But knowing how close we have become, I know I will see these people again, I know these goodbyes are only for a little while.
Then there are the students: OH, the students. I have to say if I were to teach anywhere in the world, I am so happy it has been at Xavier and with these students. Having spent a year with the seniors I am very sad to know they are moving on to the next chapter of their lives. I cant help but think, did I teach them enough, did I prepare them enough, do they know how much I love, care, and respect them as individuals, and most especially, do they know they will also be kept in a very special spot close to my heart and I will never forget them. They are wonderful individuals and I have tried my best to be all that I could be for them everyday. I know I will not be the best teacher they ever had, but I do hope I taught them how to be good Christians and live their lives as moral people. I guess that might be something I will never find out or ever know. And I know for a majority the goodbyes I say to them are unfortunately forever, but their memory will be everlasting.
Saying goodbyes and knowing how much change will come in the next few months only reminds me how short-lived my experience is here. Coming here, after spending 4 years in college, 2 years seemed as if it was such a long time. But I have only still begun my journey here, I have only begun growing as a person, and I am excited for the year ahead. I know where to put my focus. I know how to balance my life as a person, JV, teacher, daughter, and everything I am apart of here. I am sad to say all these goodbyes and sad to know how much things will change, but I am excited for what the next year will bring. I am excited to get even closer with the students and I am excited to see the change.

So all in all, times are changing and I am saying more goodbyes then I thought I would have to. But, change can be beautiful and I am excited for what is ahead of me. One year down, one more to go and I know this next year is going to be something more beautiful then I can ever imagine!


Pohnpei Summer Goals:
Study Chuukese
Learn to Play the Guitar/Uk
Read whatever I can get my hands on
Climb Shoke's Rock (mountain top in PNI)
Jump off all the Pohnpean Waterfalls!
Drink Sakua
Shop at Black Sand

Love,
Ems

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Peace, Grace, & SHARKS



The past semester has flown by, and my adorable seniors will be graduating in about a week! Though time is flying by and I will miss the people who are leaving, I am excited and ready for what this next year is going to bring. New students, new faces on staff, and I am continuing to grow into a new me.

The past couple of weeks have been very busy! The week of Holy Week we went on Re-Orientation and Dis-Orientation. We went to the beautiful island of Pisar, a small island on the edge of the reef. It is possibly the most It is the closest thing I will come close to as a Paradise or “Private Island.”
This was one of the best retreats that I have ever been on, and though that only leaves a few to compare it to, I still feel completely spiritually and mentally satisfied and fulfilled. My cup and it was running empty and I needed something to fill it back up, and that is what the retreat gave me, an even greater supply of “living water.” I found myself reflecting on not only the passage or prompts given but also on my life here at Xavier and in Chuuk, who I am and who I want to became. In that, what I need to get myself free of, what I need to let go of, and continue to get negative or painful things out of my life. Though I thought I was living an extreme Christian lifestyle in Chuuk by following the JVC values of living simply, living in a community, sharing my faith life, and learning to do justice by just being, this retreat reminded me that though I was living in these ways, that I still was not role modeling a Christian lifestyle, or at least the Christian lifestyle that I hoped to truly live out here.


Since the retreat I have found an inner drive to be there and do all that I can, while continue to take more breaks and lazy days then I ever thought I would do at Xavier. I have found a confidence that I did not know I possessed and an inner strength that I also thought would take years to achieve. I remember someone saying that through the experience at Xavier and in Chuuk, we would not only grow 2 years older, but 10 years through the struggles we overcome and memories that we make here. One goal I have given myself is to wake up everyday and say to myself, “I am a JV, I am here to serve my students and the people of Chuuk. I only have 1 year left, so make everyday count.” So doing that, I can remember how this experience, as frustrating as it can be at times, will not last forever and therefore I need to live it up everyday. Sometimes working as much as we do and having so many obligations I forget that I will not be here forever and these little frustrations are only making this experience less beautiful. I hope this will continue to make my experience here even more special and life-alternating.

The week we returned was a complete “catch up” week as we returned back to classes, grading, and lesson planning. That weekend we had Worker Appreciation Day where we celebrated our local workers with Mass, a cookout, and all sorts of fun and games! It was such a great day! It’s a really wonderful experience to feel a personal connection to the people here…when they do funny things or dance silly, its feels good to know that you have a connection and a love for that person. For my first 6 or 7 months, I did not feel that connection at all. It took 6 months to find a host family and I was still transitioning into the culture even then. But for one of the first times I felt such a connection to local people. That same weekend our soccer girls played in the Championship Game and WON!! All of our girl’s sports teams placed in the top 2 this year which has been very exciting! About a week ago I throw a “GIRLS PARTY” for them and we ate cake, ice cream, and pizza! It was a lot of fun and I think the girls were really excited! 
This past week was our last teaching week of school and we start finals tomorrow! The seniors have finals for two days then go on senior retreat and I was lucky enough to get asked to on retreat with them. The rest of the school will be taking finals Wednesday-Friday whil we are on retreat, back on the island of PISAR!
And then there was today…Alex organized a trip for us and the Saram JVs to Jeep Island, one of the resort islands so we could snorkel all day! It was the best snorkeling I have ever seen and I cant believe how many fish we saw! We even got to swim with SHARKS!! They were little, not as big as us, but they were SO COOL!! It was definitely a once in a lifetime experience!!

So as exciting as my life has been, it has been super busy and doesn’t seem like it is going to settle down before graduation! I hope everyone is doing well and I cant wait to get some updates (through email J) on everyone!!

Love and Peace
em


P.S. I should have pictures up on Facebook SOON! <3